Been There Got Out Podcast
Been There Got Out Podcast
Your Child Refuses Therapy: What an Art Therapist Says Do Instead
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Finding the right therapist for your child during a high-conflict divorce is one of the most important and misunderstood decisions you'll make.
Most parents want immediate results. They want their child to sit down in session one and start processing everything that's been happening at home. But experienced art therapist Ahimsa Luciano has seen this expectation backfire again and again, and she has a more effective approach to share.
In this conversation, Ahimsa breaks down what effective therapy for children in high-conflict situations actually looks like, why it takes longer than parents expect, and why that's not a bad thing. She explains how to match your child's personality to a therapeutic style, what to say when the other parent has told your child therapy means something is wrong with them, and exactly why the therapist can't be your source of custody intel, even when you desperately want updates.
WHAT YOU'LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Why AI will never replace a human therapist, and what the 7-38-55 communication rule reveals about what's really missing
- What makes an experienced intake truly different and why this first step is the most important one
- How to give a resistant child space to open up, even when their world feels like it's in chaos
- Why it can take months (or longer) before a child talks, and why that's not failure
- How to handle a child who's been told therapy means they're damaged - a trauma-informed response that actually works
- The truth about "parentification" in high-conflict families and its long-term impact on relationships and boundaries
- Why children tell each parent something different and why that doesn't mean anyone is lying
- What 'your child is fine with both parents' in an evaluation actually means, and why it's not the betrayal it feels like
- Why custody exchanges are a major anxiety trigger for children and the specific harm of using kids as tools at handoffs
- Questions to ask when choosing a therapist for your child including how to match personality type to therapeutic style
- Why your child's therapy space must be private and what the therapist will and won't share with you
ABOUT AHIMSA LUCIANO:
Ahimsa Luciano is an art therapist licensed in New York State and the co-founder and co-owner of Pleasantville Wellness Group, a multidisciplinary therapy practice in Pleasantville, NY serving children through adults, couples, and families. She began her career at a domestic violence and sexual assault agency as the children's therapist — an experience that gave her deep roots in working with kids navigating high-conflict separations, divorce, and trauma. Pleasantville Wellness Group offers a broad range of therapeutic modalities including art therapy, play therapy, and individual and group services, and is currently in-network with NYSHIP, United Healthcare, and Oxford for New York State clients. Some therapists in the practice are also licensed in additional states.
https://www.pleasantvillewellnessgroup.com/home
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