Been There Got Out Podcast
Episodes
368 episodes
A DV Nonprofit CEO on What Family Court Gets Wrong About Abuse Survivors
If you have already left an abusive relationship and you're now staring down the family court system, this conversation was made for you. Lisa Johnson of Been There Got Out sits down with Liz Ortenberger, CEO of SafeNest, the largest domestic a...
Nilaja Ford: The Voice of the Child in New Jersey Custody
New Jersey judges are now hearing from children directly in custody matters, and parents whose exes have spent years working on those children are alarmed. Nilaja Ford's counter is that the children were already in the middle of it. The revisio...
She Coined the Term “Co-Parenting” - Anne P. Mitchell on Surviving False Allegations
Some of the language we all use in family court every day didn’t always exist. The word “co-parenting” is one of them — and the attorney credited with introducing it sits down with us in this conversation. Anne P. Mitchell was one of the first ...
Ashish Joshi: Parental Alienation Cases That Hold Up in Court
Two labels get used for very different situations in family court, and mixing them up changes who the judge thinks is to blame. A "high conflict" case is two parents who can't agree on a pediatrician or a summer camp. A family violence case is ...
Religious Abuse & Parental Alienation: How Faith Gets Weaponized in a High-Conflict Divorce
What happens when your ex doesn’t just badmouth you to the kids, but tells them God is on their side? In this episode, Lisa talks with interfaith minister and trauma-informed therapist Sherri Heller about one of the most under-recognized weapon...
The Science of Self-Medication: Trauma, PTSD & Substance Use After Abuse
If you've been living in a high-conflict divorce or custody battle, you probably know that feeling all too well — the exhaustion that never quite leaves, the hypervigilance, the sense that your nervous system has forgotten how to relax. And for...
How to Stop Your Brain from Panicking at Every Text from Your Toxic Ex
You know that feeling. Your phone buzzes. You see their name. And before you can even read the message, your heart is racing, your chest tightens, and you can barely think straight.You're not overreacting. You're not weak. Your brain ha...
Ian Steinberg: Making Mediation Work With a High-Conflict Ex
Two parents cannot sit across a table without it turning into a fight, so the mediation moves onto Zoom. Each one waits in a separate breakout room while the attorneys shuttle between them, trading a religious holiday here for an extra week of ...
"Am I Going to Lose My Child to Alienation?" A Psychologist Answers
If you've ever found yourself paralyzed by the fear that your ex is slowly turning your children against you and there's nothing you can do about it, this conversation is for you.In this episode of Been There Got Out, Lisa Johnson sits ...
How to Survive a Parenting Coordinator When Your Ex Won't Cooperate
If you've been ordered into parenting coordination, or you're wondering whether a parenting coordinator could help your high-conflict custody case, this conversation is for you.Lisa sits down with Nicole Sodoma, a family law attorney wi...
What a Guardian Ad Litem Actually Cares About
What does a Guardian Ad Litem really think when a 10-year-old says they want 50/50 custody?Crystal Wright has heard it hundreds of times — and she can tell instantly when a child has been coached. As a family law attorney AND a working ...
Male Victim Jon: Four Years of Parental Alienation, Then a Text Back
Jon went four years without speaking to any of his four children. This episode is a follow-up: two weeks before recording, one of his daughters texted him for the first time since telling him, in her twenties, that she never wanted to see him a...
Lynn Price: How to Negotiate With a Toxic Ex
Lynn Price once walked away from a negotiation and left real money on the table on purpose. After twenty-five years and more than eleven thousand negotiations as a corporate attorney, she did it because the conflict was making her sick and she ...
Why Did the Judge Do That? A Former Family Court Judge Explains
What does a family court judge actually think when you walk through those courtroom doors?If you have ever walked out of a hearing asking "why did the judge do THAT?" — this conversation is for you.Peggy Walsh spent 18 years as ...
What Reunification Therapy REALLY Is (And Why Courts Get It Wrong)
🔁 Dr. Premela Deck is back — and this time, she's going deeper.If you're navigating reunification therapy, supervised visitation, or simply trying to understand why court-ordered therapy isn't fixing anything, this is the conversation y...
4 Expert Techniques That Keep You Calm in Family Court
If you have a court date coming up, a difficult phone call with your ex on the calendar, or you're just sick and tired of going blank exactly when you need to be sharp, this conversation is for you.Lisa sits down with Annie Brook, a bod...
Your Child Refuses Therapy: What an Art Therapist Says Do Instead
Finding the right therapist for your child during a high-conflict divorce is one of the most important and misunderstood decisions you'll make.Most parents want immediate results. They want their child to sit down in session one and sta...
What to Do the Moment Your Child Discloses Abuse
If your child just told you something terrible — or if you're afraid they're trying to — this conversation is for you.Lisa sits down with Julia Hochstadt, a licensed clinical social worker specializing in trauma, childhood sexual abuse,...
James Porfido: When Your Ex Weaponizes the Court System
James Porfido spent decades on both sides of a criminal courtroom, prosecuting cases and then defending them. What he saw over 35 years became a book about a system he believes has tilted out of balance.James Porfido has practiced law fo...
My Kid Returns from My Ex's Furious - Here's Why & What To Do
You pick your child up from their other parent's, and within minutes, the screaming starts. Maybe they're throwing things. Maybe they're kicking you. Maybe they're saying things you never imagined hearing from your own kid's mouth - things that...
How to Stop Being Terrified of Family Court with Dr. Ben Garber
🎯 "I don't know what to expect — and that terrifies me."If that's where you are right now, this conversation was made for you.Dr. Benjamin Garber is a New Hampshire-licensed psychologist, former therapist of 30 years, custody ev...
How to Stay Calm During Custody Exchanges with Dr. Andrea DePetris
If seeing your ex, even from across a parking lot, sends your body into overdrive, you're not overreacting. You're experiencing a trauma response. And it has a name.In this episode, Lisa sits down with Dr. Andrea DePetris, a clinical ps...
Monique: SB 1192, the Reclaim Act, and Litigation Abuse
Monique represented herself in her own California custody case, then went to law school. Along the way she became a trained domestic violence advocate, and she now helps organize around a bill built to address the thing that kept happening to h...
Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst: Why 14 Is the Most Dangerous Age for Parental Alienation
Somewhere around the teen years, a lot of alienated parents hit the same wall: the child who used to run to them now refuses to come at all. In this episode, psychologist Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, with fifty years helping families, offers advice ...
Sara Vandenberg: What a CPS Investigation Actually Involves
One assumption does real damage in a contested separation: that child protective services is a route to custody. Sara Vandenberg, who worked those cases from the inside, says the agency does not recommend custodial arrangements between two pare...
